one day at a time

Once we finally made our decision to move it seemed that a flood gate of emotion broke loose in me.  Everything here took on a different color.  The greens were more vibrant.  The trees and fields more beautiful.  My senses were on hypersensitive mode.

How could I leave this place?  Especially when the snow's gone!   Every year as soon as Summer finally arrives we get what we like to call Winter amnesia.  Will I have the strength to walk away from my home...the people I love??

I think about the millions of little details that has to be done and it becomes completely overwhelming.  And when I'm overwhelmed I freeze up.  I want to sit in the corner and suck my thumb. 


Being with my friends physically hurts.  The thought of starting over and making those connections that took me years to build about does me in.  Oh and moving day, I think about empty walls and a moving van.  How do I get through that?  Then it occurred to me that I don't have grace for tomorrow.  He is with me now and He'll be with me then, but I only have grace for this moment I'm in.  When I think about the future and the goodbyes etc...THAT is what comforts me.  THAT is what makes me strong.  I can only take this life one day at a time.

Have a blessed day.

the house hunting trip

Not long after we got back from Hawaii we headed to Richmond for the house hunting trip.  It was Mother's day weekend to be exact and we knew the girls had to come along for the ride. 


I had so many emotions going on during that flight.  It was surreal watching Minnesota fade into the distance.  At this point we still didn't know if we wanted to live in Virginia.  The girls and I were the seal of approval and it was a lot of pressure.

My thoughts were bouncing all over the place during the flight. I was a ball of nervous energy, excitement and yes a little fear mixed in there too.


I remember praying...Lord your will be done.  I need YOU to make this decision for us.  We have no idea what we are doing.  Keep us from tripping up.  We don't want to follow the flesh, but want what's best for our family.  I had thoughts of the girls finding their future spouses here.  This decision could possibly affect the outcome of our family for generations.  This place that is so unfamiliar and foreign may one day become our new home. 

Is this baby yummy or what?  She was our welcoming committee to the area;)

 

We were so excited to see it for ourselves.  Honey had been here for the interview process, but it was our first time. 

This sign cracked me up.  Who knew??  Think we'll get influenced and sport tattoos soon?;)

We ended up going through approximately 40 houses in 4 days.  What started out as fun quickly became overwhelming.  All the houses started running together.  I took tons of pictures and notes, but not one house had everything we wanted. 


This is the house the girls wanted.  We all loved the exterior.  Very farmhouse like.  Loved the wrap around porch.  It was so pretty.  The girls wanted it because it had a pool and fire pit area in the backyard.  No matter what other houses we saw this is the one they kept harping on.  Honey and I didn't really care for the floorplan, and most importantly it didn't have a bathtub.  For me that's a deal breaker.  I'm a bath girl.

Our realtor Ross working hard;)  He's lived here his whole life and says y'all.  I'm going to have to get used to that.  We went to a dinner party with Honey's new coworkers too while we were there and noticed right away that the kids are trained super early to say yes ma'am and sir.  I don't know why that freaked me out a little, but it did.  Don't get me wrong I think manners are great, but it seems forced to me.  In the North it's used sarcastically, and I really don't like being called ma'am.  Hopefully I'll get used to it because they ALL seem to do it down there.  Will they accept me if I don't say it??  What if my kids don't catch on! 

I really loved the exterior of this house, but it was all chopped up on the inside...UGH!  Isn't it gorgeous though?

Except for a few brief hiccups the girls were troopers.  Every morning we got up early and did nothing but go through one house after another for days.  We even extended our trip because we had such a hard time making up our minds.  We would fall into bed at night wondering how on earth the day went so fast.  There was no time to do anything remotely fun, but despite all that I'm so glad that we took them with us.  I think it really helped them get excited about the city and grasp the idea of a move.

We did steal away for just a little bit to drive downtown.  I wanted to see where Honey would be working and get a glimpse of all the history surrounding the city.  There is so much to see and learn about, but of course we didn't have any time to do any of that.  I can tell it's going to be pretty cool.





This is the picture I posted when I asked for you guys to pray.  It's really close to where we finally decided on a house.  The realtor would be driving us around and he would say...behind those trees is a hospital and over there is a school etc...  Everything was hidden.  I had no idea where anything was so it felt like we were literally in the sticks!  For this farmgirl that grew up in wide open spaces with fields and land as far as the eye can see I felt slightly closed in and claustrophobic.  I sooo hope there are some barns and cows hidden somewhere too.  Yikes! 







Change is good, but it's also hard.  I made a cuff with a butterfly on it recently that says move on.  It's my reminder to focus on what's in front of me and not behind.  That is going to be the determining factor in making this transition.


I can't say we left Richmond with a solid yes answer in our hearts.  As we boarded the plane to come home we were more confused than ever.  Seeing it in person made it real...made it possible and that was scary.  I remember looking for a sign everywhere and with every person we ran into.  We went through a toll booth and I remember looking to see if the lady was friendly and made eye contact.  We were scrutinizing the littlest things.  Looking for an answer and I have to be honest it never really came while we were there.



We struggled after we got home.  Playing the pros and cons list in our minds over and over.  It was agonizing.  The move to MN was so easy.  Someone actually knocked on our door and made us an offer before we even listed our house!  We weren't happy at the time and the Twin Cities had so much to offer, but 7 years later with kids in school, and a failing economy it definitely complicates things.  So we wavered, prayed and waited and then finally made a decision.  It all came down to a hand vote and a tail wag.  The girls were in.  They were excited and it made us excited too, and as more time goes by and the move date approaches our fears are dissipating.  It's amazing how time has a way of making things more clear.  I'm sure it's going to be a very up and down ride, but for now we are up and that's such a good thing:)  

**I promise to show pics of the house, but you're going to have to wait until I see it again.  If I have to wait so do you;)

Have a blessed day.

heat and hoopla

This week was full and overflowing on every level.  First of all thank you so much for your precious comments on my last post.  I am so grateful for each and every one of you.  You have no idea how your words of encouragement bless my heart.  Even my honey reads them and feels the love:)  One of the most comforting thoughts to me is knowing that when I move I can take YOU with me.  Whew!  Oh and who knew so many of you lived so close to me.  I'm really getting excited to get there and meet you:)

We had record highs for weather this week.  It actually got over 100 degrees!  That almost never happens here...except for when we are at the zoo obviously;)  UGH!  Why is it that the weather always sucks on zoo day?  Last time we went I think it was 50 and raining.

Despite the stifling heat we had fun.  My favorite part of course was the farm section.  The zoo here is awesome and has a real working farm.  We even got to see a cow getting milked.  I felt so sorry for that poor cow. 

 


I have to say this poor lady has in my opinion one of the worst jobs in the world.  I can't imagine getting on all that gear and then climbing down in a tank to be swarmed by fish...all the while reciting a book's worth of information to a bunch of kids who could care less.  We could barely make out a word she said and yet she went on and on.

The best part of the day was just watching little chick bounce from place to place with all her little friends.  I was a complete afterthought.  Which was fine by me.  She was thriving, and I was thriving just watching her.

We also celebrated with big chick at her 5th grade graduation.  Is that new or something?  We didn't have 5th grade graduation back in my day.  But I think it's a good idea.  Talk about a major transitioning coming.  I can almost feel the change in my Big Chick.  She's giddy about a BOY!   She's concerned about a tiny little pimple on her chin.  Twenty t-shirts in her closet just doesn't seem like enough!  WHAT??  I swear over night she became different.  She's still my sweet sweet girl, but there's definitely something different going on.


We went to the doctor yesterday for physicals and he kept giving me hard stares from across the room.  She was in there and I had this feeling he had so much he wanted to tell me but couldn't.  His daughter is going into the 8th grade and I just knew his stares meant WATCH OUT.  He kept saying it happens over night, it happens over night.  Like a scary warning from a horror movie!

Those shimmers in the last picture are bubbles from the graduation ceremony, and as they were glittering in the late afternoon sky I couldn't help but think of my little family and our new journey.  Those bubbles represent our hopes and dreams.  For us they are all squeaky clean, shiny and new.  With every slight breeze they are being carried up up and away.  Although there is this ending coming here the possibilities for there seem endless.  I feel myself getting slightly carried away too:)  

Have a blessed day.

our giant leap of faith

Back in April we took a trip to the Big Island in Hawaii.  It was amazing.  Such a rough landscape.  Hard to believe that all that black volcanic rock could be beautiful and yet surprisingly it was.  The contrast between the lush vegetation and black surface was mesmerizing. 


Everyone before us must have thought so too.  As we left the airport we couldn't help but notice the almost graffiti like presence of white rock spelling out messages all over the black rock.  As far as the eye could see hundreds and hundreds of people had made the journey to this path of destruction to say what they hoped would stay there forever.  Of course my wheels immediately started turning and all week long our little family poured over ideas.  Trying to come up with the perfect message to leave behind.

If you were reading along back in April I mentioned that it took us forever to relax and start enjoying our trip.  We had a lot on our minds.  Honey had been contacted by a head hunter and had interviewed for a job in Richmond, VA.  It was the week they were supposed to make the offer, and I knew it was going to be a distraction.  It was so hard to relax and be present with so much to think about.

We of course didn't hear anything that week.  That's how it usually works.  When you are on pins and needles waiting for an answer the answer seems to never come.  But it finally did and we had our green light.  The green light to change our forever. 


For the past several years we've been really discontent.  It usually starts in August for me.  The dread starts seeping in.  I have to really fight my feelings of fear of what's to come.  Fall quickly ushers in Winter and then it's 6 months of white, gray and COLD...bitter bitter cold.  Every year we question why we stay.  We don't have family here.  Why go through this cycle??  Well the obvious reason is that for the other 6 months we LOVE it here. We have friends that have become our stand in family.  It's comfortable and familiar and has become our home.

Through the whole process I kept hearing Honey's quote he told me once...the enemy of great is good.  It would be so much easier to stay put.  What if the girls struggle with the transition?  What about our house and finances?  What about the new job...will he like it?  What about ME?  I'm scared to death.  I remember those first few years when we moved to Minnesota.  It was hard.  I was so lonely and now I'm not.  I'm surrounded by people who love me...who get me.  Will I find that somewhere else?  It's a giant risk...a huge gamble, but yet the lure of great things...a better fit made us want to move forward.

So we picked our word...FAITH!  We picked it not knowing the future.  He didn't have the offer yet, we hadn't made a decision, but we felt change was coming and we didn't have any answers.  We didn't know how it was all going to play out, but that's what faith is.  It's living without seeing the end result.  It's living blind.  Not living with the pieces all in place.  It's trusting the Lord and believing that He's got our back.  He knows our needs and has a plan for our lives. 

And so in faith we are moving to Virginia...mid-July.  I'll be the first to admit there is a whole lot of fear and doubt mixed in with our shaky faith.  We don't have it all figured out.  We are slightly terrified...that mixed in with a whole lot of excitement.  It's a big deal to pick up and move your family and not know a soul.  It's a big deal to leave a place where you are happy, where you have made 7 years worth of memories, and say goodbye to people you love.  BUT we believe great things are in store...a new chapter is opening and we are more than willing to fill in those blank pages with God's help:) 

Have a blessed day.