Poetry people

Thank you so much for all the sweet words regarding my "empty nest".  I'm doing great.  Yesterday morning was rough.  I knew it would be.  I came in the house and had a really good HARD cry and then just gave it all to God.  I felt soooo drained after that and probably would have went right back to bed, but within minutes of my meltdown my phone rang and a sweet friend picked me up and basically dragged my rear to the gym.  Just what I needed.  Oh and Little Chick was so cute.  She wasn't sad in the least.  She was bouncing off the walls, ran on to that bus and I don't think ever looked back.  It was time:)

"tent of safety"

in the inky blackness of night

a white flash becomes a sudden strobe light

low rumblings in the distance

my eyes flicker...waiting

the crack widens

quietly she comes

my eyes focus...don't dare move

trying to decide what to do

the working man growls

her shoulders sink

my heart melts
no time to think

decision is made

up goes the blanket...the tent of safety

at once she's there warm and grateful

my arms enfold her little frame

safe at last...sleep becomes her

images form...words come and go
sleep escapes me

i am the same

vulnerable and new

my mind bounces

it turns to You

i need Your covering

cocooned in Your presence

wrapped only in Your...tent of safety

Years ago Honey and I took a poetry class in junior college.  We would huddle together and count how many times our teacher Mr. Erlanson would say "um".  The class was full of interesting characters.  They all seemed to have dreadlocks, big flowy pants and piercings.  We named them the "poetry people".  Even now when we are at a restaurant, or wherever we see one...we just knowingly look at each other and whisper poetry people.  It's our code word for the artsy...the creative.  Well I don't have any quirky piercings or expressive hippie outfits.  My hair is pretty normal, but on the inside my heart's cry is to be different...to express myself.  I recently discovered an amazing writer named Emily and she planted a seed within me, gave me a challenge.  So every now and then I'm going to write different than I talk and see what happens:)  If you want to join me...

Have a blessed day.

Bloom

I'm writing this post on Saturday because I know on Tuesday I'll be a blubbering mess.  I'm about to embark on a new chapter in my life. 

Ten plus years ago I had my first born and I remember that day like it was yesterday.  The choice to stay home and be a full time mom just fell into my lap when they placed her in my arms. 

For me it was like the decision had been made for me.  I wouldn't have known how to go out and get a job to save myself...my job was her.  I was beyond blessed to be able to have that option and am so grateful that my Honey felt the same way. 

Initially though it was hard.  I felt a little lost to who I was.  I missed people and interaction and feeling purposeful.  But as she grew...I grew into my role and before I knew it there was two.  That role of momma became me...became my new identity. 

I've been able to share every memory with them and watch them grow and it has been my joy and privilege to be mommy.  And I know that role is still mine...it hasn't gone anywhere, but it's changing.

Today they both get on the same school bus and disappear for the entire day.  I know that they will be learning and growing and becoming who they are supposed to be. 

I'm both excited and terrified.  Excited for new possibilities and scared because the old is passing away bit by bit.   I will have an entire day to myself.  I haven't had that luxury in 10 years.  I will be "creating" myself again.  Figuring out who I am and what I want.  It's going to be good.  I know it will. 

The same learning and growing and becoming is going to happen in me too.  I just know it!  The word bloom has been echoing in my heart as of late.  I feel that it's my time to open, stretch and grow to my full potential...whatever that may be.  It's going be interesting to see what God's been doing.  I trust Him.  Even though I've felt like I've been in a dormant stage for a while, I know He hasn't forgotten me...He's been working.  There is a Master plan.  I feel a BLOOM coming on:)

Have a blessed day.

Garden guilt

Happy Labor day weekend girlies.  I just wanted to thank all of you for the great comments on my last post.  It was interesting to learn that many of you were also crushing on Meg.  WHAT??!  She's mine...I saw her first...HA!  I was also blessed down to my toes to realize that many of you crush on ME.  That about made my head explode:))))  Isn't it funny...this crazy bloggy world.  Anyway just wanted to let you know that I love you guys and hope you all have a beautiful weekend.



A garden is a great way to learn some things about yourself.  In the spring I'm so excited.  I go to the gardening area and anxiously pick out each and every plant.  I dream of a garden overflowing with fresh veggies for my salsa.  The corn chips are put aside and the salsa and chip plate is ready to be filled.

Then it happens.  The three tomato plants I planted start to produce fruit.  The first week I'm ecstatic.  I'm popping cherry tomatoes in my mouth left and right.  I eat them like dessert.  They are so delicious.  Even the girls are loving it. 



By the next week I'm slowly getting sick of them.  I have them sitting on my counter until the sides start splitting and they become mush.  I MAKE myself eat some, so I won't feel guilty.  By the time the next week rolls around I'm scared to go look at my garden.  It actually frightens me.  I know if I go back there...it will have multiplied and I just can't stand to waste, but I'm sick of them.  I've given some away, but there's still more....lots and lots more!!!!  I don't can.  I don't know how, and I don't want to know how.  This thing I've created has become a MONSTER.

I just went back there a minute ago and it's worse than I thought.  Rotten tomatoes...smelly ooey gooey tomatoes all over the place.  I should take this as a lesson.  I have gifts, but this gardening thing is NOT one of them.  I shouldn't force it.  Hopefully I will remember next year when Spring rolls around to only plant one and NO cherry tomatoes.  That's it!  I have learned the hard way that I'm lazy!  Not in everything, but with gardening absolutely.  Thank heavens I didn't do this when we bought our dog;) 

Have a blessed day.

My blog crush

Hi my name is Becky and I have a huge blog crush.  It started a few years ago before I jumped in with my own blog.  She single handedly made me want to document my life.  Her name is Meg Duerkson and she has the famous blog called Whatever.  If you haven't stopped by to visit...you just HAVE too. 


Anyway it's a little sick....my crush;)  I always leave her a comment.  I rarely miss a post.  I can go to her blog and spend hours going from one little blurb to another. 

Her house is dreamy.  She decorates in my favorite style...fun and whimsical.

 

She loves color and uses it everywhere. 


She's from a sleepy town in Kansas and is just a small town girl. 


When she came to my blog for the first time...I cried.  I can't believe I'm admitting that, but I was just so excited to see her name...in all the excitement a little tear slipped out;)  I'm not a crazy...I swear I'm not!

She has an amazing gift with photography.  She takes the everyday and makes it extraordinary.


She makes fun of herself and lets her kids do crazy fun things.  She's real and transparent and I feel like I know her.


 

Anyway I know she's just like me...a normal person-a mom, and I don't have her on a pedestal or anything, but I just LOVE her:) 

Recently she mentioned she wanted a painting of a cow, and of course I knew this was my chance to bless her back:)  So Meg if you happen to read this...your brown cow's in the mail.  Thank you for all the inspiration and for sharing your life.  What an amazing life indeed!


So tell me girlies...do you have a blog crush??  Come on DO TELL!!!!

Have a blessed day.

Oh and by the way awhile back I got a package with some free samples of paints and brushes from DecoArt.  The sales rep said she couldn't wait to see what I came up with.  So Miss Sales lady...I loved your paints.  They were smooth and rich and made my brown cow beau-ti-ful.  Thanks soooo much!!!  I love free stuff.  So anyone else out there...bring it on;)

 

All photos borrowed with permission from Meg Duerkson.