Tuesday, June 7, 2011

our giant leap of faith

Back in April we took a trip to the Big Island in Hawaii.  It was amazing.  Such a rough landscape.  Hard to believe that all that black volcanic rock could be beautiful and yet surprisingly it was.  The contrast between the lush vegetation and black surface was mesmerizing. 

Everyone before us must have thought so too.  As we left the airport we couldn't help but notice the almost graffiti like presence of white rock spelling out messages all over the black rock.  As far as the eye could see hundreds and hundreds of people had made the journey to this path of destruction to say what they hoped would stay there forever.  Of course my wheels immediately started turning and all week long our little family poured over ideas.  Trying to come up with the perfect message to leave behind.

If you were reading along back in April I mentioned that it took us forever to relax and start enjoying our trip.  We had a lot on our minds.  Honey had been contacted by a head hunter and had interviewed for a job in Richmond, VA.  It was the week they were supposed to make the offer, and I knew it was going to be a distraction.  It was so hard to relax and be present with so much to think about.

We of course didn't hear anything that week.  That's how it usually works.  When you are on pins and needles waiting for an answer the answer seems to never come.  But it finally did and we had our green light.  The green light to change our forever. 

For the past several years we've been really discontent.  It usually starts in August for me.  The dread starts seeping in.  I have to really fight my feelings of fear of what's to come.  Fall quickly ushers in Winter and then it's 6 months of white, gray and COLD...bitter bitter cold.  Every year we question why we stay.  We don't have family here.  Why go through this cycle??  Well the obvious reason is that for the other 6 months we LOVE it here. We have friends that have become our stand in family.  It's comfortable and familiar and has become our home.

Through the whole process I kept hearing Honey's quote he told me once...the enemy of great is good.  It would be so much easier to stay put.  What if the girls struggle with the transition?  What about our house and finances?  What about the new job...will he like it?  What about ME?  I'm scared to death.  I remember those first few years when we moved to Minnesota.  It was hard.  I was so lonely and now I'm not.  I'm surrounded by people who love me...who get me.  Will I find that somewhere else?  It's a giant risk...a huge gamble, but yet the lure of great things...a better fit made us want to move forward.

So we picked our word...FAITH!  We picked it not knowing the future.  He didn't have the offer yet, we hadn't made a decision, but we felt change was coming and we didn't have any answers.  We didn't know how it was all going to play out, but that's what faith is.  It's living without seeing the end result.  It's living blind.  Not living with the pieces all in place.  It's trusting the Lord and believing that He's got our back.  He knows our needs and has a plan for our lives. 

And so in faith we are moving to Virginia...mid-July.  I'll be the first to admit there is a whole lot of fear and doubt mixed in with our shaky faith.  We don't have it all figured out.  We are slightly terrified...that mixed in with a whole lot of excitement.  It's a big deal to pick up and move your family and not know a soul.  It's a big deal to leave a place where you are happy, where you have made 7 years worth of memories, and say goodbye to people you love.  BUT we believe great things are in store...a new chapter is opening and we are more than willing to fill in those blank pages with God's help:) 

Have a blessed day.

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