Monday, October 20, 2014

the hard...raising a teenager

This parenting thing isn't for the faint of heart.  I posted recently on IG that growing up was hard on both the kid AND the parents.  Our experience so far has been an emotional roller coaster.  We moved here three and half years ago just as our oldest was starting junior high.  We thought it was our last chance to do a move...any older and it would just be so HARD!  Guess what?  It's still been hard.  It probably would have been even if we stayed in Minnesota, but yikes if it isn't a constant struggle.

And here's the hard... it's not what you think when you think teenager.  There isn't a rebellion issue.  We don't worry about sexual promiscuity or addiction problems...thank GOD.  I have friends who have had these impossibly difficult issues and it's no joke.  My heart would break in a million pieces, but this "hard" is still HARD!  And it still hurts my momma's heart.

The struggle here is being known.  Having that one person that truly knows and loves you unconditionally.  It's fitting in.  It's finding like minds...beliefs.  It's being labeled quiet, shy, or worse yet being viewed as stuck up because you don't have anything to add to a conversation...because maybe you don't listen to the same music, go to the same movies or know the inside jokes.  It's having unique talents and abilities and feeling uncomfortable when they are brought up.  Like you should downplay who you really are...and who you really are is pretty darn amazing!!!

It's putting on a smile or laughing when you don't really feel it.  

It's feeling invisible.  

I remember this. I felt a little odd man out at times in school.  But I went to a small school and we all knew each other.  I graduated with 40.  There are over 2,000 kids in her high school.  Such a different world.  

It's navigating through the very murky waters of finding and being yourself and waiting patiently for your soul to be seen.  Ugh!  I think it's something we can all relate to.  I know it really doesn't get any easier as an adult.  Building community is always high on my list...yet it's so slow going.

So we pray, we console and we remind her and ourselves that He has a plan.  We are in the palm of His hand and He knows our innermost desires.  He loves us.  He is our Abba daddy and wants those things for us too.  His timing is perfect.  It is!!  But darn if the process isn't painful.

Be a blessing.

Speaking of someone pretty darn little chick celebrated 11 years!!! She wanted, of all things, an electric pencil sharpener.  Guess who got the fanciest one I could find:)  Big chick topped it though..."she's never drawn me before". Tears!!
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